Coasting on Fumes & Candy Canes into 2015

I don't like to brag, but i'm usually pretty good at the holidays. I like making a list. Checking it twice. The whole thing. I love baking cookies and selecting the perfect gifts for people and plastering everything in my path with twinkle lights. I make a point to send out tons of holiday cards and host special gatherings and play festive music. But this particular holiday season has effectively mashed up my brain and left a misshapen sugar plum in its place. I think it may have something to do with being oh so ready for this year to end. It's making this final push toward January 1 (albeit filled with joyful things) feel like the last couple steps of climbing a mountain. I'm going through all the holiday motions and doing my very best to be present in every moment of it, but there is an undeniable disconnect. I'm not particularly surprised that I feel off my A-game this December. The entire year has felt like the perpetual equivalent of getting up on the wrong side of the bed. I was never quite able to fully catch up. I'm sure anyone who has experienced any sort of trauma this year can relate to the ripple effect that lingers and becomes a layer of your day-to-day functioning that feels clunky and unfamiliar (I can't entirely blame the trauma though...it can't possibly be helping my mental jumble that i"m moving for 2 months starting Christmas Day). For the above-mentioned reasons (and the acute sugar shock I am experiencing resulting from eating a cutout cookie for breakfast), I have no coherent post to share with you this week other than to wish a very happy Christmas and a Merry Hanukkah (if you celebrate either of those) and a New Year that augers the birth of new and hoped for things for all of us. 

To each & every one of you who has read this blog every week and reached out and shared your own stories and thoughts with me, THANK YOU. From the bottom of my heart, that has been the greatest holiday gift I could have ever asked for.

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